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April 17, 2016 / hbrowne4

Stolen Dog

Stolen Dog

“Juno’s gone'” Cried Abigail, tears streaming down her parchment white face “Someone has stolen her. She was here just a moment ago.

“Not a very likely story” thought James Busteed, prominent member of the independent Republic of Cork. “She most likely let the blasted animal stray again. It’s extraordinary how often when people say something was there just a moment ago it actually subsequently turns out that it was anything but just a moment, in fact, quite often significant periods of time may have passed by.

Still I suppose we’ll have to do something about the mangy bitch. Juno I mean, not Abigail”

Abigail meanwhile was fluttering up and down the strand calling out in a piteous whine interspersed with racking sobs “here Juno, here girl”

“James” She sobbed “What are we going to do? I’m convinced that someone has stolen our darling Juno. We must report her loss to the police. I’m sure they’ll be interested in a case of dog napping, won’t they? I know, why don’t we swim out to the cave over there and see if she’s there, it’s an easy swim and we can quickly be back here if she turns up here

Assuming his most magisterial air James said in his irritating tone of voice “We’ll do that immediately and the we’ll go to the office of Cork Advertiser and Commercial Register and place an advertisement in its lost and found column. I’m sure they’ll give it a prominent position in the paper, I’m a close friend of the editors you know”

“Oh James, would you?. I was under the impression that you didn’t like my Juno. That’s why I refused your kind offer of marriage last week. I couldn’t live with someone who doesn’t adore my beautiful canine friend”

“My darling Abigail” James protested fulsomely “Of course I like your dog, perhaps not sitting up and eating off the dinner table with us, but in her proper place, the outside kennel perhaps”

“James” Said Abigail sternly “Methinks you doth protest too much. I detect a distinct coolness in your demeanour when you talk about my darling pet. I’m beginning to harbour suspicions that you might have some part in her mysterious disappearance. Is it possible that it’s all a dastardly plot to separate me from Juno?”

With a sly smile James said “Darling girl, you’re stressed out about your poor dog, only that could explain your hurtful accusations. I think I should bring you to the Chinese Restaurant for dinner. You’re probably hungry and I believe they have a new dish of the day on the menu tonight”


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